Thursday, August 18, 2005

NEW MILITARY RECRUITING FORM ...

I'm in the military - active duty. I served in the Afghanistan War and the Iraqi War (and may go back). I believe in the war and believe we're doing good things over there for the Iraqi's - and to defeat terrorism around the world - I'm not a Chickenhawk.

When you enlist in the armed forces, you have to sign a lot of paperwork. All kinds of paperwork. Privacy act disclosures, Drug disclosures, Code Of Conduct affirmations, etc.

In light of recent news, I think we may need a NEW form for recruits to sign and here is my proposal for one ...

I, ___(Last, First, MI)___, who wish to enlist in the armed forces of the United States of American do hereby disclose and affirm the following ...

That my __(Fill in name of relative here ... example: MOTHER)__ is a LEFT WING LOONY BIN and a member of the Democratic (Terrorist's Rights) Party. Additionally, my aforementioned relative also subscribes to an unrealistic PACIFIST IDEOLOGY and is known, through personal statements, to be __(list other anti-social condition here ... example: ANTI-SEMITIC).

I am not responsible for the opinions of my aforementioned relative - in fact - I hereby disassociate myself from any of his or her opinions or activities. In the event of my heroic death serving this country - it is my wish that the people of the United States of America disregard any childish or wacko statements or actions he or she takes on my behalf. Further, no left-wing liberal looney tunes organization (that normally spits on military servicemembers and calls them "murderers") -- even while pretending to "care" about me has my permission to use my name to promote their political agenda or raise money.

I make this declaration freely and without mental reservations. I hereby also declare that I am enlisting in the armed forces of the United States voluntarily and not through any form of conscription or draft. I consider myself a PATRIOT of this country and fully support the actions of my chain of command - including my Commander In Chief. If I should fall in combat, please remember that I did so in the service of this country and that I freely gave this service to defend FREEDOM AND DEMOCRACY AROUND THE WORLD - WHICH IS THE LEGACY OF UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. In this manner, I would like to be remembered.

Signed this _____ day of ____, 20__.

______________________________
SIGNATURE

1 comment:

Mauser*Girl said...

*LOL* That's funny. But yes, they should require that. They require that you tell the Army who gets your remains if you get killed. They should require that you get a say in what you'll be remembered for.