Monday, April 23, 2007

Brown Hand Liberals ...

Many thanks to Sheryl Crow for giving us a new name for extremist liberals - which I'll call now "Brown Hand Liberals". The reason? Well Sheryl doesn't want to get inside your bedroom - just your bathroom. And she wants to keep an eye on your "movements" there.

Folks - I can't find a better example of the "death of liberty" than the government getting involved and placing limits on how much toilet paper you use for your hygienic needs. I mean ... forget GUN CONTROL ... this would seem like the most extremist move any government could make. But don't listen to me ... listen to Sheryl's own words ...

"Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating. One of my favorites is in the area of forest conservation which we heavily rely on for oxygen. I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don’t want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required. When presenting this idea to my younger brother, who’s judgment I trust implicitly, he proposed taking it one step further. I believe his quote was, “how bout just washing the one square out.”

Word of advice ... if you ever meet Sheryl Crow - DO NOT SHAKE HER HAND!!

Folks, this is just one more reason why these Hollywood performers should never be listened to.

Note to Sheryl - "You're completely Phail". When they coined the phrase "Beauty is only skin deep" - you're the one they were thinking of.

Also ...

Let's have a look at some of Sheryl Crow's consumption habits. You be the judge of whether or not she's being hypocritical here. The Smoking Gun has Sheryl's Smoking Gun.

BREAKING NEWS: This just in ... Nixon's Ghost has obtained an exclusive photo of one of Sheryl's own TP holders ...


1 comment:

Rick Janes said...

Although I consider myself a liberal (unreformed), these sorts of antics by the likes of Sheryl Crow are just plain embarrassing.

Toilet paper is easily biodegradable and doesn't use as much wood pulp as, say, CD covers or glossy posters advertising your next concert.

What's filling up the garbage dumps of the world are those things which take decades to degrade, such as, well, Sheryl Crow CDs. (And I'm not even sure that the plastic of which CDs are made will ever break down chemically from exposure.)

I'll bet that -- like queen hypocrite Barbra Streisand, who kept her NYC condo air conditioned to a comfy 72 degress even when she was in LA, while telling the rest of us to conserve energy -- we'll find out Sheryl uses much more than a few sheets of TP per bathroom visit. (Unless, of course, she has 'celebrity' TP and each sheet has the absorption power of ten of the Charmin sheets us serfs buy in the store.)

When she's caught, no doubt her 'spokesperson' will make the same explanation for her hypocrisy as Babs' flack did: "After all, she is a star!"