KATRINA WAR STORIES

War Stories ...

... I was traveling east on I-10 headed back towards Pascagoula a week or so ago after a day of working on my flooded house in Slidell, LA. I was exhausted. It was pitch black night - but suddenly, headed westbound - I saw a motorcade of vehicles with flashing lights on the top of each...

As they passed me - I could see they were all white SUV's - and all had painted, in big blue letters on the side - either "FDNY" or "NYPD". All of these vehicles and their occupants were screaming down I-10 toward New Orleans - and the site brought tears to my eyes. I'm sure I'm not the only one who got emotional at the sight of these "Yankees" coming to our assistance. Finally, on the Gulf Coast anyway - I think the Civil War is finally over.

... At the local Army surplus store in Slidell, La - an interesting sign ...

"Looters will be shot ... Survivors will be shot again!"

... A contractor from some company called KAPE comes by my house while I'm cleaning out the mud in it to tell me that he will replace my whole roof plus pay $800 of my hurricane insurance deductable - all I have to do is pay the rest of my deductable and he'll haggle with my insurance company over the rest of his money. All I have to do is sign a contract and all my worries are over. Yeah right - hit the road carpetbagger.

...Quote from the same carpetbagging contractor ...

"I noticed you have your windows open but that isn't going to help dry out your house ... it's 50% humidity out there."

My response ...

"Actually, if you were from down here you'd know the humidity was more like 80-90% - and, regardless there Mr. Rocket Scientist - would you have me SHUT the windows to dry out the house?"

... From my neighbor, TJ - who STAYED in his house during the storm ...

"So I was in my attic, but I was afraid the flood waters would drown me. I kicked out some vinyl siding, jumped into the water, and swam over to YOUR house. I was going to kick out one of your windows on the second floor - and hide out in there until the storm was over. But every time I jumped on your roof - the hurricane wind blew me back off. So I just swam back to my place, and hung out on my roof. Damn, that rain felt like nails driving right into my face. Some lady down the street was up on her roof, and she kept yelling at me to jump into the water again to save some dog that she was afraid was about to drown. I told her 'Woman - I'M ABOUT TO DROWN - AND MAYBE YOU TOO - I AIN'T WORRIED ABOUT NO DOG!"